Burda magazine August 2013

I’m not going to lie to you – there’s a whole lot of ugly again in this issue! After last month’s disappointing collection, I was very hopeful that the first of the Fall fashions would herald a return to some great Burda patterns, but alas!

I’ve tried to shield your poor eyes from the worst abuses and find some nuggets in the poo, but I just couldn’t help it. Happily, though, if you’re Plus-sized, you get the best patterns of the whole issue!

The entire Downton Abbey-inspired feature was just fugly so I’m going to pretend that just doesn’t exist. Moving swiftly on…

When the photos for this issue were first previewed, I would’ve never guessed that the tech drawing would look like this! This seems like it could either be a fantastic take on a basic long sleeved tee, or a really annoying noose that gets in your way and drags in your tea…

What an awful 1980s double sweatshirt abomination, paired with an even uglier leather skirt just to make the sweatshirt look not quite so bad in juxtaposition. Even the model looks sad that she was forced to wear this.

The 1970s Marianne Faithfull feature wasn’t much better (because there’s nothing I hate more than hippie style, or the 1970s!), but it did contain these slim leather trousers. I’m not as keen on the long-line blazer, which, for Tall women, is just going to further elongate them, right?

This red suit is absolutely the best of the regular-sized patterns in this issue! I’m not even usually a fan of blazers but the cut is really great here – classic yet interesting, and it comes paired with a really well-proportioned pair of trousers, too. Even better that for some reason Burda chose to have the coloured illustrated instructions for the blazer, even though they’re usually reserved for the most remedial patterns in the issue (you can see Burda forgot to remove “Easy Sewing” from the top there, which clashes with “Advanced” and “Masterpiece” just beneath it!)

I like this dress from the waist up, but the pleats on the skirt are WAY too deep to be flattering, especially in such a stiff fabric. Divide the pleat width in half and distribute that fullness into two pleats on each site to avoid the “grand canyon” look!

The coat’s okay (a bit bathrobe, though), but omg what the ugly crap is that red velvet dress on the left?! You can see her navel and it’s got ties on it like some bad Pirates of the Caribbean costume! Burda haven’t even bothered to give it a full-page photoshoot here, and only shown it once in the magazine, like they’re hoping no one will notice how flabbergastingly disgusting it is!

Ok after that I need a bit of a palate cleanser, and happily there’s a nice peplum top here which reuses the bodice from the pleated dress, and it’s paired with the trousers from the red suit. We’ve seen a lot of peplum top patterns in the past few months so it’s refreshing to see an asymmetric and very full one for a change.

I still stand by my comments on the hideous 80s sweatshirt even though it looks a million percent better sewn up in boucle, without the weird double collar opening, and paired with some normal trousers instead of a turtleneck and leather balloon skirt. In fact, I rather like the idea of a boucle “sweatshirt” paired with some leggings or skinny jeans. You know how much I like my alternative “sweatshirts”, after all…

There’s no vintage pattern this month, but we do get a gloriously floaty, pleated dress by the designer Wolfgang Joop, of 1980s Joop! fame.

And now onto the far superior Plus-sized section for this month, starting with this lovely 1940s-inspired tea dress. I can’t work out why it’d require a belt and a tie though…

omg you guys they reprinted that November 2012 vintage wiggle dress in Plus sizes!! You remember when I made mine last winter, right?? I wore it all winter long and got so many compliments on it – it’s such an amazing and flattering pattern! Great job, Burda! If you’d rather buy it on its own as a pdf, just go here.


(I am somewhat disturbed that I appear bigger than Burda’s “Plus” model, however…)

And finally, not only do Plus ladies get a lovely silk blouse with a jaunty side neck tie, but they also get the love and affection of a bearded hottie…

I’d love to say that I hold out hope for September’s issue, but the white 1980s cutout sweatshirt/parka thing on the last page doesn’t really get me excited…

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